Neon lights were flashing to upbeat music on the roller rink floor. The smell of pizza filled the air. I hadn’t been to one of these places since high school! Nerves were showing on my kids’ faces as we laced up their skates.
“There’s too many people, Mommy.” My daughter said.
“You can start in the kid area over there,” I reassured her as I pointed to a smaller floor with little kids.
“Mommy will be watching right here.”
As I helped her onto the rink with the skate trainer, she struggled a little bit to get moving. But after a few minutes she figured it out and became more confident.
My son decided he was “too cool” to use the trainer to lean on. He stepped onto the floor, took 1 stride and fell right back down. Instead of crying or asking for help, he got right back up and tried again. He proceeded to do this for a while – making strides, falling flat on his back, laughing, and then trying again.
He wasn’t giving up.
Meanwhile, I was silently wishing I could strap on some skates myself.
Remember how fun this was when you were a kid? I thought to myself.
But as quickly as that thought came in, the what if’s came even faster.
What if I fall and re-injure my bulging disc?
What if my kids want me to watch them?
What if I forget how to skate?
What if I’m skating and I’m not there to help my kids if they fall?
What If?!
As I kept watching my kids, seeing how brave they were and how much fun they were having I realized something;
It was my turn to be brave.
“Mommy is going to skate too!” I told them with a smile.
As I stepped onto the rink, I was a little shocked – 20 years and my feet still knew exactly what to do. I started out steadily, as some kids racing passed me. Eventually I picked up speed as I made a few laps around the rink, and realized the anxious thoughts were gone. I knew then:
This wasn’t about my bravery to skate, it was about my bravery to let my kids navigate the rink (life) on their own.
Truth is, ever since something unimaginable happened, I turned into the helicopter Mom. It’s common sense to keep an eye on your children in public places, but for me it was getting over the top. By doing that, how were they ever going to learn to be brave?
I was listening to a podcast by Allie Beth Stuckey the other day. She talked about how a Mom let her 7 year old son buy dinner at Chick-fil-A by himself. She parked where she could see him, but she stayed in her car. When the kid came back, food and change in hand, he was so proud of himself!
A thought crossed my mind, I might NEVER be able to let my kids do that.
But then I felt God say,
“But what if you could?”
What if I could step back and let them be brave?
What If fear didn’t stop me?
What if God is waiting for me to see how Big he is?
What if on the other side is my breakthrough?
As I was skating, I saw my son in the corner of my eye skate right by as he was chasing his cousin. He was still falling but it didn’t seem to faze him.
Then, I saw my daughter.
“Mommy, I’m ready to try the big kids area!”
Ok God, I get it! I thought to myself. Thank you for showing me If I step away from them, they will be ok.
“Mom, will you give me $10 if I make it there and back without falling?” My Son asked as he pointed across the room.
Guess what…he did it, and now I owe him $10 😊
What is something you could change from asking “What if?” to “What if I could?”
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